Cupid Poop Cookies

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For all the single people out there who dread Valentine’s Day, I have a cookie created just for you. While everyone else is passing out chocolates, flowers and heart-shaped cards you can hand out something that expresses your true feelings for this mushy day, Cupid Poop cookies.

I came up with this idea after I saw Unicorn Poop cookies popping up around the internet. I have to admit that at first I was grossed out by the thought of a poop cookie but, just like a car accident, I couldn’t turn away and I ended up checking out the original blog post on the cookies. As disgusting as they were, I was really impressed with the creativity and started to think about other types of “poop” that could be made from this idea. With Valentine’s Day coming up, and knowing that I have some single friends who hate this holiday, I thought I should twist the idea into Cupid Poop. After I made them, a friend of mine called them Strawberry Shortcake Poop. So I guess you can get two kinds of poop out of this one cookie!

I love that the inside is just as colorful as the outside of the cookie.

I even found a funny poem on the internet so I put the cookies in gift bags and attached the poem on a tag.

The poem reads:

I couldn’t send you flowers,
and candy wouldn’t do.
And mushy cards just didn’t say
the things I want them to.
So I got you something special,
and here’s the inside scoop.
I found you something very rare –
It’s genuine Cupid poop!

The original Unicorn Poop cookies used a sugar cookie recipe for the dough. I decided to use a cream cheese cookie recipe instead. This is a recipe that I use to make candy cane shaped cookies at Christmas. It is very simple and uses a cake mix as its base. The rest of the cookie is similar to the Unicorn Poop, just altered a bit for Valentine’s Day. Click here for a printable version of the Cupid Poop Cookie recipe.

Here is how I made them.

Everything you need for these cookies is as follows; one box of white cake mix, 3 ounces of softened cream cheese, 1/4 cup of softened butter, one egg, pink and no-taste red food coloring (I prefer gel paste because of its intensity), white sparkle gel, heart sprinkles and white pearl sprinkles.

Step 1: Make the Dough

To make the dough, blend together the butter, cream cheese and egg. Add the cake mix (if you live in a high altitude, add a 1/4 cup of flour along with the cake mix) and blend together well.

Step 2: Color the Dough

Remove 1/3 of the dough and set it aside in a plastic sandwich baggie. Add some pink food color to the rest of the dough and knead it until blended through.

Divide the pink dough in half and place half in a sandwich baggie then add some red food color to the rest and knead it until blended through. The reason I start with the pink dough, in making the red dough, is that you will need less red food color if you start with a pink base instead of the colorless dough. Place red dough in a sandwich baggie.

Step 3: Form the Poop

Use a measuring spoon to portion out one teaspoon of each dough

Roll each dough into a rope about 4 inches in length.

Press the ropes together

Roll the dough once more to make the ropes attach together better and to extend the length to about 6 inches

Hold one end gently with the bottom of your fingers and use the fingers on your other hand to roll the other end and create a twisted rope. The colors will swirl around like a candy cane.

Now the fun begins, it is time to shape the poops. Think of how this might happen in nature and go from there. If you need help, and you have a dog, go out in the yard and check out some of their “creations.” Slightly pinch the dough on the end to make it thin out a bit.

Step 4: Add Sprinkles

Now to add some “texture” to the poop. Press the heart and pearl sprinkles randomly into the dough

Place on an ungreased baking sheet. I put six poops on a sheet at a time.

I’m not sure if it is necessary or not, but I then placed the cookies in the refrigerator for about 15 minutes, hoping that it might help the them retain their shape better while baking.

Bake in a preheated 350 degree oven for 7-9 minutes. Remove from cookie sheet and allow to cool on cooling rack.

Step 5: Add Gel

The final touch that makes these cookies look realistic is adding the gel to shine them up in a mucusy sort of way. Once the cookies have cooled completely, squeeze some sparkle gel over a cookie.

Use a pastry brush to spread it all over the cookie, making sure to get inside all the creases and dips.

Now you have your Cupid Poop!

Remember, poops don’t all look exactly alike so give each one its own style.

Here is even a heart shaped one.

If you want to mess with your kids, leave one on the floor on Valentine’s Day morning. You could even leave it in a clean diaper on the floor; I just didn’t have one to do that with.

Have fun and may your Valentine’s Day be filled with more love than poop.

Until next time, God Bless and Sweet Dreams.

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    1. Hi Lisa, I’m sorry you are having trouble with them. They do tend to spread and flatten on me a bit too. The original recipe was for making candy cane cookies and those cookies always spread out on me some. That is why I always refrigerate them for a while before baking. I feel like it helps with the spreading but I could be wrong. I wonder if adding a little flour to the cake mix would help (like they often suggest on the mix boxes when you live at high altitudes.) To be honest, I don’t really totally understand the science behind it all so that is just a guess. My first suggestion would be to refrigerate them longer and see if that makes a difference. Sorry, I know this isn’t the greatest of help. If anyone else has any input or ideas I would love to hear them.

    1. Hi Judy, to be honest I don’t remember exactly since it has been almost a year since I made them. I wish I had kept track of that. I am going to guess somewhere around 2 dozen. I think you would be pretty safe to plan on that. If you make them, let me know how many you got out of a batch and I will update it in the tutorial. Sorry I couldn’t give you an exact number. I hope they turn out great for you.

  1. I have spent my morning browsing your website. I have a running shopping list for the different projects that I am going to try. Have you applied at the Food Network?You are truly an inspration!!!

    1. Oh Sheila, I can’t thank you enough for your kind words! You don’t know how much they mean to me this week. I have had a rough, discouraging week. I was about ready to just give up baking all together at the beginning of the week. I guess we all have bad days. 🙂 You are so sweet to remind me that I have been of help to others. And what a compliment that you would consider me worthy of Food Network! The people on their shows are so amazing. I would love to have that amount of talent and confidence in my baking/cake decorating abilities. Thank you again. You really lifted my spirits.

      1. I am so glad I was able to lift your spirits! Oh I hope you don’t decide to quit sharing your talent, I have sent your link to a couple of my baker friends to check your site out because I know they would appreciate the detailed instructions/pictures and creations you have shared on your site.. 🙂 This weekend I am doing your Jaconde cake. You certainly are helping others, people like me that would love to be at your level – I just searched the internet and up came your link and so happy I found it! Happy baking….love the car you recently posted!

        1. Thank you again Sheila! What a blessing your comments are to me. 🙂 I hope your joconde cakes turn out amazing and you dazzle those who you are serving them too! Have a wonderful rest of your weekend.

  2. i love this idea, my boyfriends been a real shit lately so im making a poop themed valentines day card and im buying a poop plush doll and making these cookies! Hoping this will get him out of his shitty mood. haha 🙂

  3. This has got to be the cutest idea hands down. but since I’m married I still love it, I made raindeer poop for Christmas for my BIL and SIL and they loved it, I’m seriously thinking about this one, they would so get a kick out of this. Your talent is beyond words and so great. you should be very proud of yourself, not many people can do this and do it so well… have a great Valentine’s Day.

    1. Hi Nancy,
      This is an older blog entry, before I used a recipe plugin for my entries. In my older entries, I created a Word document that had a printable format of the recipe and attached it to a link. If you find the paragraph just under the poem you will see it says “Click here for a printable version of the Cupid Poop recipe.”
      Click on that and it will bring up the printable recipe. Hope that makes sense. Sorry for the confusion.

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